So I picked up the car on 10/23. Dealer kept telling that you cannot combine OL w/ college grad so I was not able to use it. Anyways, here’s a thread breaking it down:
They just didn’t want to chip in the extra dough.
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Right?! I’m a bit annoyed, but the terms do say in stock vehicles and not on custom orders. I didn’t want to push too hard.
If the fine print says they can’t, why would you assume they can and just don’t want to? They aren’t going to take a chargeback of 500 just to make you happy.
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Dealer said I can do either college grad or OL, not both. So technically, I could have gone OL and not college grad on a custom order.
There are other folks on here who got both college grad and OL. There are also folks who got OL on a custom order.
Id bet money the dealer told them they’d honor the OL code, and included it in the dealer discount. This was brought up before by one of the BMW CAs here as the most likely way it’s handled. If the fine print says no, FS will charge it back to the dealer. IIRC, that same CA also indicated they can’t be combined.
Just to add a datapoint here - When I bought my 330e, the dealer was able to stack both OL and college grad. Another dealer who was competing for my business straight up told me that he will not apply grad rebate even if it is given to them by BMWFS. 
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How did you word your email when asking about a custom order? Did you ask like along the lines, here is a build I have at $XX, XXX MSRP and would like X% discount? You can pm me too. That is an awesome deal! Been looking at xDrive too with just a slightly lower MSRP than what you have.
I asked for 12% off MSRP knowing I’d be OK with as low as 10%. I also said I can make the deposit that same day.