This is it . Imagine if something bad happens and you feel lifelong guilt for saving a few hundred dollars. New cars are not necessarily safer due to performing better in crash tests , they are safer due to the preventative features.
Or just have the kid buy his car? Let him pick (WITHIN REASON) whatever he can afford.
This way it’s his and he can use it when he comes back for Thanksgiving, Winter break, spring break and the summers.
Aside from updates and better performance 20 years later for almost every system you listed (along with better passenger compartment integrity, side impact integrity and front crumple zone impact absorption), how about those systems your 2002 e46 didn’t have that will help avoid that crash in the first place?
Forward Collision Warning - not checked
Reverse Collision Warning - not checked
Lane Departure Warning - not checked
Rear Cross Traffic Warning - not checked
Blind Spot Warning - not checked
Collision Mitigation Braking - not checked
Adaptive Cruise Control - not checked
Adaptive Headlights - not checked
Back-up Parking Assistance - not checked
Front Camera - not checked
Rear Camera - not checked
For me, those go to nice to have column, not necessary to have. As my dad said, that’s what your eyes and mirrors are for.
Yeah, when it comes to the safety of your child I guess you really don’t want to spend any extra on those “nice have column items” after all.
No, I teach my kid not to rely on those gadgets and learn how to drive safely and correctly without them. He can do parallel parking just fine with my e46. YMMV of course.
Folks, now we can see why those insurance rate are going up, because of you people who don’t teach their kids how to drive properly LOL.
It’s totally impossible someone else hits your kid without them messing up at all? Kinda a weird viewpoint. I agree that a new car vs a 5 yr old one may not be leaps and bounds different safety wise, but pretty sure a 20 yr old m3 is gonna get crushed by a modern car safety wise.
You do you tho
So you assume that anyone who has a car with modern safety features for their child has also decided to not teach their child to drive safely? Hmmmmm, seems to be a reasonable conclusion. 
Let me ask you this-
As a professional child driving instructor that would not allow a child to “rely” upon any modern safety features, how are you able to teach their reflexes to be faster than the ECU for forward or rearward collision avoidance and/or LDW, how to see out of the back of their head (blind spot, cross-traffic, rear camera for a child behind the car and shorter than the rear window) and develop, install and maintain their own cabin-integrity, airbag or seatbelt-tensioner upgrades on the beater you have so graciously purchased for them?
Sounds like you have it all figured out so maybe you can share this knowledge with the rest of the clueless parents?
Pretty sure 1 yo honda accord will get crushed by a trailer safety wise, Should I get my son a hummer then?
A car hydroplaned & flew 3 lanes to the left lane into my son’s car & then his car into the median. 1 week ago I almost lost my son. But, thanks for the critique rn. Kind of the situation when a mom asks people that are experienced in car leasing for help, to add input or don’t comment.
Some would say yes and that there is no replacement for mass. I wouldn’t buy them a super compact car in general.
The reality is everyone else drives around in their massive SUV so ya driving a smart car is also going to increase your risk solely from a mass standpoint.
These are practical, realistic considerations one should have when selecting a vehicle.
My post is critiquing the poster who said a 23 yr old bmw was of appropriate safety quality today, it was not critiquing you. It’s very understandable as a parent who had a kid who underwent a bad accident that you’d be concerned about these features and safety performance.
Glad your son is ok, but I don’t think that is what @Pinhigh27 was saying or inferring?
Edit:
Plenty of people driving 2000+ car just fine. If you want to spend money giving your kid a new car, good for you. I don’t. I prefer to give him my old e46 so I don’t need to worry about him messing up the car. Does that make me a bad parent? Here’s my answer HAHAHAHAHA.
There’s a whole lot of ground between my rusted 23 yr old BMW which is a death trap on wheels and a brand new car.
Right, as was said “you do you” - your money, your kid.
Unlike you, instead of saying “I don’t need to worry about him messing up the car” I am far more comfortable in saying “I don’t need to worry about the car messing up my kid.”
Just because you don’t maintain your car well, doesn’t mean other people do. LOL.
So buy a hummer because the honda accord will not fare well against other SUV. LOL.
Sorry. Clearly a sensitive time.
Based upon your 
responses I feel bad for you but even worse for your kid.
Good luck with your Child Driving Academy.