I do understand your suggestion, but unless OP has a ton of cash laying around, not sure how they are going to pay off a loan on an X3.
@Tommctech11 - What is the remaining balance on the loan?
I can, but then I would end up paying taxes on the purchase would be over $2k. It may be worth it in the long run, depending on what I can get for it privately…
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You’re right on this one. I technically can pull the money out some stock holdings if I really needed to, but this is a want, not really a need. Also would have to pay tax on the purchase. Around 34k
I just want to say that I don’t want to come off like this is a “I have an answer for everything” pose because I’m genuinely looking for feedback, I’m just trying to reply to every post and appreciate all of the suggestions.
Look at the bright side, she picked you.
As @Qbrozen said, shop for a car for her, not a deal. There are a lot worse things in life you can write a check for than negative equity. Fortunately you are in a position to do so.
Not that it matters because it seems like your wife has already made up her mind, but that negative equity check you are going to write is going to be way more than any out of warranty repair unless you need a new engine or transmission for some reason.
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Check here and see what’s the highest offer you can get. After that you can lease her a GC 4xe. There are good lease deals here on the forum. I would separate the transactions. Yes, you won’t be able to roll the negative equity but you will probably save thousands.
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If you’re worried about the tax implication of selling stock, consider using a 60 day rollover working capital cash from your IRA or 401k.
You can withdraw cash from your 401k or IRA… then use that cash to buy the BMW, then sell the car (to Carvana or some buyer). Then take the original amount of your withdrawal and put it back into your 401k/IRA.
Since you’re trying to roll negative - there’s a chance you’re still underwater if you fail to do the roll… so this isn’t a risk free option for you. But for many people it is a quick and cheap way to get 60 days of working capital.
You’re allowed one of these wonky rollovers per year. As long as the cash ends up back in a qualified account within 60 days there is no withdrawal penalty or tax hit.
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True, I was going off OPs comments, sounded like it might have been doable for them.
Not sure if I am missing something but you would only be out $4K ($2K negative equity and $2K taxes) versus the original $7-9K negative equity you mentioned. The way you should look at the trade in is the trade in value + the tax benefit if the taxes are a concern.
I’m not trying to come across rude or judgmental but if you’re worried about $2K in taxes, I think the best option for you might be to keep the car.
Polestar offers a 24-month lease that you can terminate 5 months in. Wonder if the maximum LTV is 120% on those leases.
See if she likes the Jeep GC4xe. I can’t see picking that over an X3, but I have one of each (ok, really an X4, but same idea). Jeep has lots of rebates you can use to hide the negative equity. See if they also are offering some really low MFs as well.
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Not rude or judgemental at all and I appreciate the questions and the feedback. Its actually a potential viable option in my scenario. It just sucks to have to float that money until I can sell the car. But if need be, 100% doable.
Thank you again for the feedback
I have done it before. You meet the buyer at the bank that hold the lien, he beings a certified check and you do as well and pay off the loan together.
That doesn’t sound terrible at all. Was getting the title a pain in the ass?
It would be crazy to terminate a lease with an LTV over 100% in 5 months. My guess is there would be some kind of penalty.
Not at all. As long as the buyer is a reasonable person it should work out.
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A member did reach out to us recently and were able to do so. YMMV.
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This does not compute. 
This looks like an impossible mission to me.
Constructively, I’d bow out of the search and put her in charge of her own destiny here.
If cost is a consideration, of course agree in advance on how much to spend.
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In this, you are correct. This is the path we’re choosing. We’ve agreed on a price range and she’s just going to pick whatever she wants. I’m taking this as a lesson learned. No more “hand me downs”. She’s a great woman and contributes so much to our family (both financially and not) and deserves whatever she wants (within reason of course).
We are just going to sell her car privately though so we’re only talking about a few grand. I didn’t realize it was such a doable process when you have a loan out on the car. Thank you everyone for all of your input. I really do appreciate it.
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Glad to hear that.
My spouse and I share nothing in common in vehicle priorities, so we each just get what we want, with zero expectation of compromise. I didn’t even mention the last car I got until after it was mine (ours?).
It works so much better for us this way.
Hope she finds something that makes her happy. It’s out there.